Wednesday, 2 March 2016

A Tough Decision

It has been a roller coaster ride for me since my son was born.  Accomplishing all the milestones have been a challenge and fun too.  My friends kept making plans to go on a holiday leaving kids back at home but my conscience never allowed me to leave pratham for few days.  He has his Dadi,  Bade Papa,  Nani,  Nana, Masi and Bua who he loves and can stay with them too.  I always preferred to go for a 3 to 4 hours party where I would came back and see him sleeping.  When I wake up in the morning,  I would see him.  So this has been the routine for almost 5 years.
I always read or heard from parents that a break without kids is needed in today's lifestyle.  Main Reasons being :
A)  Child learns to be independent.
B)  the "WE"  time : The couple gets to spend time with each other as they barely talk anything else besides child related things.
C) As parents, we also get a break from our daily chores.

But this never made a big difference as I was never prepared to leave him alone for days. So we missed out on many activities which could be done only as couples.I always looked for family oriented outings and activities. My husband planned only boys trip.  But I could never think of leaving my son back home with his Papa and going on a holiday. 

But then comes up a very good friend's wedding which was outstation. It was important that we both attend it but we couldnt let my son bunk his school.  So after many ifs and buts,  it was decided that only my hubby and I go for the wedding leaving my son behind with my in-laws n my parents. 


Too many questions going on in my mind.  Is it the right thing am I doing? Will he be OK when I am not around? Will he hate me because I left him and went?
Ufff.. No end to the the anxiousness.

The final day came when we were leaving.  I was scared that he would cry if I left in front of him. So the thought came that I should leave when he is not around.  But then I felt that he should see me going with my suitcase so he knows I amnot around for few days. He was absolutely fine and smiling when I left though I had tears in my eyes. Till I reached airport,  I kept on thinking what he must be doing. On reaching the destination,  I called him up and he was absolutely fine.

We attended the functions and wedding and it was time to be back home.  I was super excited to Hug Pratham.
On reaching Mumbai,  I was thrilled to see his reaction.  Every minute seemed like an hour.  AND there he disembarks his school Bus.  We both hugged each other as if we met after years.  Wow..  What a feeling.

So true," There are lot of things that I am proud of but Nothing can beat being a Mom."