MY TAKE ON BEING A MOM TO A SINGLE CHILD

“Beta, it’s time to have a second baby” was one of the statement I used to hear few years back (and of course I do have to listen to it now but rarely) Statements like these can never be argued or carried forward as a conversation but here are my thoughts (or I wish I could reply back to those aunties) :

•     “Siblings are great companions” - I do have siblings and we bond very well. We, the grownups, are busy with our careers, family and life; we seldom meet. I know they will always be there for me when needed but when I actually need them, they are pre committed which I will not say is wrong.  21^st century kids are so independent that they will make friends quickly.
•         “Beta, you have a good family support” - yes I do have super support from my husband, mother in law, my mom and all others. But this is no reason to have a second child. At the end, I am the mother and I am responsible for everything. I can take their help but cannot be depended on them.
  
•      “By God’s grace, family is financially good.” -  I am very glad that family is financially strong and can afford many kids but that is not the reason why I am not having a second child. Beside education, there are many other expenses like after school activities, Holiday trips, Birthday Parties and the list goes on which demand not only finances but devoted time. I rather have one child and give him best of everything.
  
•     “Having a second child, increases the bond between husband and wife” : Really?  After having our child, we already spend very less time with each other as during the day we are busy with work and when he is free in the evening/ night, I am busy with my son’s classes and homework.  So in case if we have another child, We won’t see each other for days :)
  
  

I am confident that PN Jr.  will grow as an independent, obedient and caring Human. Few people believe that a single child tends to grow stubborn and self centered. There are families who have 3 to 4 children and yet are very stubborn. So it’s totally on one’s nature how he grows to be.

I might face the following challenges:

•   Inculcating sharing habits.
•   Taking care of the younger ones.
• Assuring safety while I play with other kids.

 But, all of these would have to be managed and implemented whether I have 1 or more children.

At the end, all I can say is..

 A mother to a single child is a happy mom who makes sure that her family too is always happy.

Correlation

Learn while you travel

Learning is always fun especially when it is while you are travelling. Travelling teaches many valuable things which we can apply in our work too. Below mentioned are few skills which I feel correlate at work and while you travel -

• Keep calm : Delayed flights / trains; least preferred hotel rooms, always-complaining passenger and so on teaches you how to keep cool and enjoy the trip. Being adaptable to situations and circumstances also helps in managing stress.
•  Time management:
  This is one of the most important skills that we learn especially while travelling with children. Advance research on the places to visit and their working / opening hours could help in saving lot of time.                                                                                         
  
• Visualization: When travelling with different groups of people, we learn how each individual thinks or feels about a place thus broadening our thinking too.
  
• Planning: Imagine, it’s your toddler’s lunch time and you are in the middle of a boat ride where there is no food available. Timely planning could have avoided this situation where the toddler could have been fed before getting onto the ride.
  
• Communication: It is very important to communicate in the right manner keeping in mind different cultures have different ways to interpret things. Always be a good listener to be able to communicate better while travelling.
  
• Appreciation : As we travel, we also learn about different cultures of different countries. We enjoy listening to and discovering their history. Appreciating the same will enable us to adapt to different cultures easily.
  
•  Make friends:
  Making friends with strangers while on travel helps in understanding their culture better by learning their language, tasting their local food and so on. It is so amazing to discover how every individual from every culture is so unique and different.
  
• Curiousness: The inquisitiveness to know about a place helps to improve our knowledge and enhances the cognitive skills too.
  
• Be adventurist: It is good to experiment new ideas and experience things out of the comfort zone.

No matter where and how you travel, you are always learning something useful. Similarly, whatever work/ job you do, learning from mistakes & developing new skills takes place on a regular basis.

On to a new journey

My journey from motherhood to a facilitator has been a fascinating one – because I enjoy sharing my knowledge with the younger ones. Being an inspiration to my little one has made me realize that I can make a difference in the lives of the learners. I truly believe in 21^st century learning which means all of us are learning at every stage.

          After completing my “Early Years in childhood” teaching course from a renowned institution, I decided to enter the Education World. During my journey, I learnt:

• Each day, each child brings with him an immense number of variables and possibilities.
• Lesson planning with class management is a must.
• Its absolutely OK to fail in the lessons that are planned.
• Every learner is different and unique.
• Always listen first.
• Age appropriate experiments are one of the best ways to understand and learn concepts.
• Sharing essential knowledge leads to a positive bond of communication.
• Connecting home and school makes us a great community of Learners.
• We inspire, mentor and support.
• With good co teachers, we also make new friends.

         Though it was a tough decision to take up a job which is filled with so many responsibilities, it gives immense happiness to know that the children have taken back something that they did not know before. The ability to share knowledge is a bit like a superpower.

Dedicated to all the mothers who decided to take this bold step of “being a working Parent.”

Let them get bored

 

Today when we get bored, we have or know lot of things to do like:

•      We read books, articles, newspapers and so on.
•          We go for a walk or go cycling
•          Some of us love to write. So we even pen down our views / thoughts.
•          Some of us even dance on loud music.
•         Some make such beautiful paintings in their boredom.
•         Some invent new recipes which are so delicious. Many more such activities that all of us indulge into.

BUT,

Ever wondered what our kids will do if they were in our place?

The answer is: they would either watch TV or play on iPads, mobiles, tablets and other gadgets.

Why is it necessary to always plan something or the other for our child? Why is it that we have to think whether they will like or dislike a particular activity?

In holidays, I have seen most of the moms sign up their kids for summer camps. In spite of attending 6 to 8 hours of school, yet they enroll kids for all sorts of classes. Upon asking few of them, I have most common replies:

1.       I am a working mom. I don’t have extra time to spend it with her. So its better she goes for some activity to “keep herself busy”.

2.       I don’t have the patience to entertain him for 4 hours until he goes to bed.

3.       He gets bored after coming from school. So its better he goes for some classes.

Just think this way. Years back, when we were young or in our teens, did our parents think the same way as we do today? We ALSO GOT BORED. But it is during this boredom, we learnt to grow.

·       When we went out for family gatherings, we also got bored. But we learnt to interact with everyone whether elder or younger than us.

·       There were days when we could not step out of the house and we got bored. But we knew what all games or activities to look for at home.

·       I used to finish having dinner well before time than my cousins. But I had to wait until they finished theirs so that we could play again. I got bored waiting for them. This gave me a chance to talk to others around and helped me to kill my boredom.

·       Our parents did have a had social life. They too had friends and relatives coming over. They would get busy with them. We got thoroughly bored. BUT we learnt to go in the room and play some game on our own.

I am not comparing full fledged between us and our kids. Yes, we have moved forward a lot but we need to think seriously on this. If we don’t let our child get bored and then how is he/ she going to be able to decide what all can he/she do to pass by their boredom. It is high time that we stop entertaining them all the time. We must stop planning their days and weeks in advance.

It is absolutely OK for kids to get bored. Boredom is one of the important factors of our lives. It is when we get bored; we get into a thinking process. Boredom is scientifically linked to creativity. It is the wandered mind which helps people to “think out of the box”. Research has shown that boredom can inspire the mind to have a creative solution to most of the problems. Since, most of us don’t like to get bored for too long, we tend to get motivated to seek out new goals and experiences.

Space Journey : A Magical Story

Pratham and I love doing Sunday activities where we have no rules. Imaginations which have no limit no logics. We like to get into a Fairyland and meet different types of characters.

What else could have been better than taking up the #ColgateMagicalStories contest. We unpacked the parcel that we received from Colgate and Pratham’s imagination had no boundaries. Below is his version of the story with his favourite Topic SPACE.

       Once upon a time, there lived two best friends named Tim and Noah. They loved exploring and experimenting adventurous activities. They enjoyed listening to NASA stories and their inventions.

      Tim wanted to visit SPACE. Next day was Tim’s birthday and he hoped that when he wakes up he can go to SPACE in a Rover. Noah arranged Astronauts’ suits. Tim could not hold it initially as it was too heavy but then they managed wearing them. They packed their essentials and set off for their “SPACE JOURNEY” in a Rocket. ZOOOPPP went the Rocket. While travelling to Space, they saw many shooting stars. They saw few heated red colour balls which have a tail of dust and ice crystals. Tim immediately recognised that they are COMETS.  Noah was excited to see Space Stations and showed them to Tim too. Tim explained “Space stations allow astronauts to live and work in Earth’s orbit.”

                                                                                
 

      

          
On their way Noah insisted that they visit Venus. Tim explained to him that they cannot land there as its the hottest planet and they will melt due to the heat on Venus. “ Look Noah! That planet is rotating in the opposite direction to the other planets. That’s Venus” exclaimed Tim as they saw from far. As they halted in Space, at first, they couldn’t balance themselves as there is no gravity.  They started drifting away to a Red colour Planet. Noah and Tim at once said, “MARS” as they had learnt in school about Mars. Suddenly, they felt tremors. They rushed to their rocket and took off. They saw hot gush of volcano erupt. 

          Just as they thought of relaxing, they saw a Giant planet Jupiter. Just after this planet they saw another planet which was spinning like a top. Before they could realise, the strong winds of the massive storm around the planet pushed them away. Noah and Tim felt giddy and landed themselves on hard surface which was made up of rocks, ice and dust. “We are on Saturn! And these hoopla hoop rings spinning horizontally are the rings around the Saturn” Tim excitedly jumped. The naughty Saturn bounced them to the next Planet Uranus. On their way they saw a flying object. “Thats UFO” exclaimed Tim.  “Oh My God! My Ears are hurting. My ear drums will be damaged due to the loud sound made by the planet and the rings spinning around it vertically.” cried Tim.

                                                                                

Its been days since they had seen their parents. They were missing their families and friends. As they landed on another planet, they felt very cold. The wind was as cold as ice. ” We are on Neptune” exclaimed Tim. They saw an Ice Palace. As they were about to enter it, they saw some different looking creature coming out. “ Tim, lets run back to our Rocket, they are Aliens” said scared Noah. Tim explained to her that Aliens are nice and kind. So they made friends with few of them and headed to return to Earth.

As Tim settled himself inside the Rocket, he heard a familiar voice calling out to him .....

“ Tim! Tim! Wake up. Its 7 O’clock. It’s time to go to school.” It was Tim’s mother waking him up to get ready for school. As he opened his eyes to the bright sunny morning, he thought to himself “ I missed visiting the hottest orange yellow ball of mass”.

“I’m blogging my #ColgateMagicalstories at BlogAdda in association with Colgate."